Chapter 1

So I've had a few eventful weeks in a row this month. Amazingly enough, I've come out alive with minor scratches. This began as a single post, but I quickly realized it was turning into a novel...so, if you care to read, cool. It's mostly for my own sanity right now. It'll be in chapters now.

At first glance, September seemed to be a promising month...I mean, I had plans to visit Brad in France, hang out with Shannen, watch NFL on Sundays and see a 1 date friendship potentially turn into "dating". So, with a glimmer of optimism in the mind, we enter August. I had spent the later days of August in Chicago to be apart of this guys wedding and spend time with good friends. I returned to CA just in time for a series of photo shoots which I would describe as both "fashionable" and "celebritory". I was asked to consider a position as full time Studio Manager, which I've been considering and ultimately want. I met someone I liked...dated...had fun, went to Thai food, Bowled, Movie-d etc. y'know, the dating thing without being in a relationship? That was August.
What happens next is simply a look...no more...no less...I'm in the process of selling the story to a few screenwriters so some details are omitted. My sister says I could write a book about the first two weeks alone. And so we begin...

Sunday Sept 7th. First week of NFL:
I'm pumped cause I get to watch the Vikings lose (not a surprise). I'm enjoying my time at B.J.'s in Burbank sipping on a Stout and chewing on a Great White mini pizza while watching 5 games at one time. It's pretty amazing actually. 10AM-4:40PM pure NFL amazement. The afternoon games finish and I'm making my way home when car trouble comes my way and kept coming and eventually she clipped me two blocks from my apartment. Fast forward: Two hours later I'm car-less, key-less and...well...briefly homeless.

*The character which follows is loosely based on my before mentioned sister's dog Musky (who was lost and running scared on Venice Blvd. for a good 2-4 hours)*

Sept 8th:
and I'm running back and fourth from Sherman Oaks to Van Nuys, almost exclusively on foot (public trans is horrible). Off to "jailbreak" my car in Van Nuys.
Impound Clerk: "It looks like there's a 30 day hold, you're gonna have to get a signed release from the Police."
Me: "Um...why is there a 30 day hold?"
Impound Clerk: "Not sure pal, could be your out of state DL, just head over there and they'll tell ya what to do..."
Me: "Well, can I at least get my apartment keys?"
Clerk: "Sorry pal...not without a release...next."
So, I head over to the Van Nuys police department to discuss the situation with the Police, who actually turn out to be "Auto Detectives"? After a brief discussion with the Detectives, I was told my car was on a 30 hold because I had been driving with an out of state DL. Apparently California requires a residence of the state to have a valid CA drivers license in order to operate a motorized vehicle, who knew. I guess it makes sense but I'm starting to become a champion of Federal drivers licenses, or bar codes on the wrist, that makes more sense. So I head off to the DMV, on foot, about 4 miles. To my total lack of surprise, the DMV was packed already at 7AM. I speak with a clerk and tell them I need to apply for a CA DL.
Clerk: "...a passport or birth certificate..."
Me: "...but a valid out of state DL won't work?"
Clerk: "...sorry pal, just bring a passport of birth certificate and that should do...next."
So, I walk out of the Van Nuys DMV, look around with dismay as I try to piece together where I am, how I got here and where my apartment is. I find myself boarding a metro transit bus, paying the $1.25 fare and asking the driver where the heck he's...well, I'm headed. Without keys to my apartment, I stumble up the entryway stairs to the door. Apartment's locked! phone's dead, keys gone, nobody can hear me knocking and it's almost 10am, who would be home anyway? I'm stuck. Where to go? Of course, where does everyone go when all else seems lost and need communication? The mall. Apple Store, email Kurt
Me: "dude, have to deal with some DMV stuff today, hope that's cool. My phone's dead, otherwise I'd call...I'll be checking my email".
Kiosk, phone charger...excellent! Call roommate who was home the entire time I was running around...figures. I get myself back to the apartment and shower, shave, change clothes and tell a couple stories to my roommate E. With a glint in my eye and a skip in my step, I grab my passport and cruise back to the DMV via public transportation. An hour later, I'm strolling into the DMV in Van Nuys ready to slam my passport on the counter, fill out a CA DL application and finally curb stomp the teeth outta the written test. I'm a little nervous at this point, I mean, I've always had my MN DL. It's helped me get out of "sticky situations" many times in the past and I was sad to see it go. I grab an application, get a number (B073), and wait for it to be called. I wait for my number to be called...*"now servicing A074 at counter number 3"*. wait for my number to be called...*"now servicing F809 at counter number 14"*. And wait for my number to be called. An hour passes and I am now a genius in the studies of California traffic laws, I all but sprint to *"now servicing B073 at counter 20*" to hand over my application, passport and knowledge of the California roadways to the DMV clerk (and ultimately, the Governator of CA).
Clerk: "...just read this and sign both copies please."
Me: "...wait, what is this? Are these citations?"
Clerk: "...yup, and you can see there are a couple of them, one in 2005 and the other in June...see, right there."
Me: "...what!? 2005?! So this is going to keep me from taking the written test then?"
Clerk: "...that's right, sorry pal, just sign this and call the number at the top and they'll tell you what you need to do, okay?...*"now servicing B074 at counter number 20*".
After fighting my way through cross town traffic on metro bus 183 (I began to call them by name), I was once again at my apartment. The number I called happened to be for the OC courthouse in Irvine. The before mentioned tickets were understandable; I mean, once I looked at the dates that is. *flashback 2005* "I mean, it's not often an ex-girlfriend leaves her Silver Mustang available while she leaves you for an ex in Australia now is it? naw...go 95mph on the 5 passed the exit she used to live off, go ahead, it's a good idea."* That ticket was $650. The $1520 citation wasn't as dramatic, it was basically a routine stop for my right headlight being out. Apparently this time my MN DL didn't help. In fact, that was the reason it was so expensive. That and not having proof of insurance or registration in the car at the time. Believe me, in the 10 years I've lived in CA, I've been pulled over before and never got cited for those three things before. Which encouraged the laziness I suppose.
I received a late night phone call from C, the girl I had been taking to movies and dinner. She was worried something had happened, cause I didn't call her Sunday night like I had said I would.
C: "...I was just worried something happened and I couldn't sleep, I'm glad you're okay. I'll talk with you tomorrow okay? I'm sooo sleepy."
Me: "...yeah...I'm fine, thanks for the call, g'night."