Friday, May 25, 2007
Friday, May 11, 2007
Thursday, May 3, 2007
Travels Begin.....Tomorrow!!
Two weeks ago I was setting my schedule for the month of May. I really couldn't believe I would be traveling to New York City, Chicago, Minneapolis, Houston and Boston all within days of each other. I think back one year ago and cringe at where I was:
1. Sleeping on an air mattress in the kitchen of a bachelor apt. in Redondo Beach.
2. Working with an individual who would like to attain greatness, but has no capacity for it.
3. Ignoring and denying bills and debts as if the responsibility would just melt away like butter on hot toast.
4. Finally; Repeating the same daily routine with the belief "this would get me where I was best suited to be."
Now don't get me wrong, there are many things that have not yet changed, but a mentality for change was created in a very very short period of time.
1. I still sleep on an air mattress, but in my own room with my own bathroom. Air mattress to be gone once I'm done traveling.
2. I work with individuals who would like to attain greatness, but actually have the capacity to do such, and desire to pass that on to individuals like myself.
3. I haven't resolved my "parking ticket issues" but that might take some time for me to justify, but I have a different mindset and philosophy regarding responsibility with money and where it all goes.
4. I'm grasping the idea that I am best suited where I was meant to be, around successful individuals who see and desire to see the potential I possess come full circle. Where I can be at my essence PRODUCTIVE and INVALUABLE.
I was listening to Erwin McManus this morning on the way to work,(a ritual I assure you will become daily) and he was talking about the moments in our lives where we just don't get why God has placed us in the situation we are in. We look around and see everyone else getting away with murder, but WE know if WE even attempt to do ANYTHING WE know isn't exactly right, WE will be punished, or disciplined. WE hate that idea, at least I do. So, I wrestle with God, I actively rebel against what I know to be right, I indulge in the Solomon pleasures of life which all do become meaningless in the end. Listening to this, I couldn't help but reflect on all that I have experienced in this year. Rebelling, indulging, ignoring, running, denying, fighting, asking and finally...reflecting. The sweet silent whisper of God which came to Elija was with me in MN. In the sleepless nights, physically weak and worn, there was a whisper saying "don't quit, you are intended for great things". I know God disciplines those he loves, and I can assure you, I've questioned many times whether or not I even love God myself. I know he is actively guiding my life, but many times not in the way I would like, and as a child I scream and yell because I don't get my way, and as a child...question whether or not that discipline is worth loving those who discipline.
And now, in the stillness of this night, here in Laguna Niguel, I reflect once again upon those events of the year past and wonder, where would I have ever been able to go, do or become without the violent discipline and quiet whisper of God teaching me and guiding me through events of my own life?
Tomorrow I leave for New York City and cannot believe the very desire, so often shadowed by the desire to find true intimacy, is now a reality. I will be traveling for business, for pleasure, for photography, for experience, for friends...for it is God's will I do such, without asking, without my control and without my own immediate desire...I travel. Thus, this is truly the beginning of "A look at what's next".
1. Sleeping on an air mattress in the kitchen of a bachelor apt. in Redondo Beach.
2. Working with an individual who would like to attain greatness, but has no capacity for it.
3. Ignoring and denying bills and debts as if the responsibility would just melt away like butter on hot toast.
4. Finally; Repeating the same daily routine with the belief "this would get me where I was best suited to be."
Now don't get me wrong, there are many things that have not yet changed, but a mentality for change was created in a very very short period of time.
1. I still sleep on an air mattress, but in my own room with my own bathroom. Air mattress to be gone once I'm done traveling.
2. I work with individuals who would like to attain greatness, but actually have the capacity to do such, and desire to pass that on to individuals like myself.
3. I haven't resolved my "parking ticket issues" but that might take some time for me to justify, but I have a different mindset and philosophy regarding responsibility with money and where it all goes.
4. I'm grasping the idea that I am best suited where I was meant to be, around successful individuals who see and desire to see the potential I possess come full circle. Where I can be at my essence PRODUCTIVE and INVALUABLE.
I was listening to Erwin McManus this morning on the way to work,(a ritual I assure you will become daily) and he was talking about the moments in our lives where we just don't get why God has placed us in the situation we are in. We look around and see everyone else getting away with murder, but WE know if WE even attempt to do ANYTHING WE know isn't exactly right, WE will be punished, or disciplined. WE hate that idea, at least I do. So, I wrestle with God, I actively rebel against what I know to be right, I indulge in the Solomon pleasures of life which all do become meaningless in the end. Listening to this, I couldn't help but reflect on all that I have experienced in this year. Rebelling, indulging, ignoring, running, denying, fighting, asking and finally...reflecting. The sweet silent whisper of God which came to Elija was with me in MN. In the sleepless nights, physically weak and worn, there was a whisper saying "don't quit, you are intended for great things". I know God disciplines those he loves, and I can assure you, I've questioned many times whether or not I even love God myself. I know he is actively guiding my life, but many times not in the way I would like, and as a child I scream and yell because I don't get my way, and as a child...question whether or not that discipline is worth loving those who discipline.
And now, in the stillness of this night, here in Laguna Niguel, I reflect once again upon those events of the year past and wonder, where would I have ever been able to go, do or become without the violent discipline and quiet whisper of God teaching me and guiding me through events of my own life?
Tomorrow I leave for New York City and cannot believe the very desire, so often shadowed by the desire to find true intimacy, is now a reality. I will be traveling for business, for pleasure, for photography, for experience, for friends...for it is God's will I do such, without asking, without my control and without my own immediate desire...I travel. Thus, this is truly the beginning of "A look at what's next".
Wednesday, May 2, 2007
Dare I wander?
This afternoon:
Fodorstravel.com, yep, that's my new favorite website for this month. I've been trying to determine if it would be wise to stay up all night in Manhattan on Friday, wandering the streets til dawn. My sister doesn't think it's a smart idea, I'm beginning to agree with her. There was once a time when I wandered around Vienna til 4am, but I think those days are over, or they should be. I mean how much do you think it would cost to get a hotel room (nothing fancy) in downtown Manhattan? $180.00/night? I'll be spending a total of three nights in NYC and to commute from NJ everyday doesn't seem worth it either.
Fodorstravel.com, yep, that's my new favorite website for this month. I've been trying to determine if it would be wise to stay up all night in Manhattan on Friday, wandering the streets til dawn. My sister doesn't think it's a smart idea, I'm beginning to agree with her. There was once a time when I wandered around Vienna til 4am, but I think those days are over, or they should be. I mean how much do you think it would cost to get a hotel room (nothing fancy) in downtown Manhattan? $180.00/night? I'll be spending a total of three nights in NYC and to commute from NJ everyday doesn't seem worth it either.
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